"I'm all out of foolproof ideas so don't ask me how to get started, it's all uncharted."

I read somewhere that we should be our own thinspiration. Personally, I like this idea as a concept, but how can it work in reality? If you aren't happy with what you are, or what you have ever been, then how can you 'aspire' to be yourself?

When I see photos of myself, I find them pretty triggering. Just because, as an art student, I've learnt to be critical of photos and images so that I can change them. So, I see a photo of myself, and instantly I will see the flaws. I will see everything that I don't like. Usually (and yes, it's pathetic), I'll remove that spot, or fix my eyebrows, or make my smile just that more smiley. But then I realised, everything that I hate about my body and shape, I see that in photos too. So why can't I edit that? Obviously not publicly, it would be a bit odd for one photo suddenly coming out of me looking a lot better. But, why can't I edit these photos to make myself look how I 'aspire' to look, and then use those as my thinspiration? Something that I could actually achieve, knowing that this is how I could actually look.

So, I thought I would share this 'experiment' with you, using (badly) edited versions of myself as my own 'thinspiration', to see if maybe, this will give me the strength that I need to become the girl on the left, and stop being,

The Girl on the Right.
x

(Sara Bareilles - Uncharted)